o yes, Memories are an inseparable part of human mind.. um.. rather human life. Imagine what all you keep in mind, like you remember things, people, incidents, experiences, decisions, relations and what else and what not! But then, why do people have memories at all or why are we biologically designed to ‘remember’ something? I focussed NOT on ‘how’ memories, but on ‘why’ memories.
We can understand why, by actually having them divided into some interesting categories. For clarity, I will convert each memory into a small statement/question. Perhaps their naming convention here could seem a misfit, but not the theme.
Type-1: Shall we call them ‘Survival Memories’? These are just the bare minimum to help in the essential continuum of one’s life. Like staying beside a water hole should help one a lot, or you should ‘remember’ there is a Tiger in that cave and shouldn’t go that side., You should remember that an iron rod is hot when in fire and so should you not touch it…or “oh! my manager will be coming early today and so should i 😉 ” etc. Say your hunting/cooking skills are in this category. (Skill is founded on a memory)
Type-2: Shall we call them ‘Comfort Memories’? Asthese help in the betterment of life and more or less relate to improving the existing conditions of one’s life. Like “i didn’t find a single grain last summer, so i will stock these now itself!” or ‘o! this is spring time, so i should find a lot of honeycombs around’..or may be ‘I would better pull out my wet coat – it will rain cats & dogs this season’.. etc., (planning is mostly for comfort :p right?)..
Type-3: Shall we call them ‘Social Memories’? These are little more intriguing and supposedly be adding value to a man’s social life. Simply put, they help a man stay in groups and contribute. Like ‘I will stay with this group for better safety in this forest and/or i may get a mate too’ or ‘ ‘Do I get the best cabaret there down that lane?’ or even “let me do this for the sake of x/y/z” etc
And so in the end, if you look at the Biography of a man, its nothing but what all he could ‘remember’ and is a compendium of all his own memories, his survival, his comforts, his social life and everything his’, all in correlation with each other. Believe and understand it straight that the constituents of a man’s life viz.. love, hatred, loyalty, greed, gratitude, revenge, … and everything else is justly tied up to a ‘memory’.
So, now you take any memory of yours and you can just fit it in any of the these 3 slots here., then you will have a matrix of emotions underneath, that links this one memory with all others. I don’t intend to dilute it by a broad generalization but suggest me if there is any other category. If not for their categorization, what I wanted to stress upon is this:
- if you remove the memory, then everything else that is tied to it is also removed automatically;
- if at all you can alter a memory, you can have a greater control over all other connecting components;
- the greatest accomplishment is to have all these memories as is, and still be able to manage yourself to a positive end;
Lets look at these one by one.
Remove a Memory:
Nature does this job wonderfully. And as a special mention, people generally forget all good things so peacefully, without a trace, that they don’t even realize they have/had a privilege. I also had a relating post on ego & forgetfulness sometime back. But yes, in the end, if something is removed from your mind, good or bad, you will live happily with no acknowledgement of what is removed. check yourself and let me know.
Alter a Memory:
Neither medical science nor any mythological/medieval history ever had a trace of ‘altering’ a memory. No one could change a memory that is already given away to your neurons. But what can we do for sure is to change how you perceive/interpret it.. We can change what you think is a sad thing, add some positivity to it and then keep you moving on. We can make you look at the same incident from a different perspective so that you can understand all sides of it. As a matter of fact, it is a big booming business, involving billions of dollars world-wide…. “change the perspective of a memory”…. you call it writing books on positivity, staff training, TV serials, TRP ratings, news channels, numb relations or dumb politics …. whatever.
Have them as is:
This is the toughest part and so is a greatest accomplishment if you do it. Close your eyes and dump all your memories on the table, segregate them and acknowledge each and every one. Never don’t try to deny any one of them, for it only complicates things. Just like you can’t change the past, you can’t change the memory of it. What best we can do to learn from those sour feelings is only to learn from it and try not to repeat. Be accountable and responsible for what has happened. Then, what best we can do with those sweet things is to share them with others and if possible, repeat them to someone else. Appreciate who has caused that good to you and never forget them.
So, what now?
People often attach false notations to the concept of a memory. They ignore the dynamism with which the matrix of emotions changes with the rate of change in the memory repository. It is often intentionally disregarded that a memory can be replaced with, if not removed or altered. There is not much of a discussion available on this replacement part anywhere. I personally found it very interesting that if you try to replace a memory with another one you want, then you are actually resulting it in an ‘altered’ state. So, is a replacement some sort of ‘pseudo-altering’ of a memory? o yes, take an example and you will get a line on this. And finally,
- If you think something is good or bad permanently;
- If you have never tried to dump/categorize your memories so as to re-assess yourself and your repository;
- If you are impatient to read long texts before you understand their depth;
then, it is time you quickly change some things in your life. But whatever, pl let me know your comments 🙂